CROOK!!!!

I couldn't quite completely plagiarise one of my favourite Young One's eps, 'SICK', but basically that sums up my day today!

I'm buggered, rooted, run down whatever way you want to put it....but I ask this question. $100 used be a huge achievement, a large sum to possess, now it's not....I'll spend $100 putting petrol in my car and paying my phone bill. It's like that now with sick days....once a luxury to be embraced now they are a gigantic inconvenience.

You'd beg, borrow, steal, lie and cheat to score a sick day off while you're at school! I knew a kid who would go close to others just in the hope of getting ill and scoring some time off. You would try and time it so that you felt dodgy on a Thursday or a Friday so you could align a 4 or 3 day weekend....of course then you risked being told "You were too sick for school....now you're too sick to play sport!"
There was an art to it and many privileges....sympathetic foods for one, the bonus of watching Jerry Springer in the hope of seeing boobs and also carefully sneaking in some Playstation time! Generally speaking, an injury is best because you can lay down iced up or bandaged up and still score some video game time, an illness was a little tougher and moulded your entertainment.

A stomach sickness or a flu meant "LAY DOWN AND DON'T MOVE!!!" the slightest car crash on Carmegeddon or car jacking on GTA might induce car sickness so faking that meant you had backed yourself into a corner....a victim of your parents care!
Still, I lay here now feeling like shit and I'm immensely frustrated. I have to keep busy! I can't lay still for a moment, I'm a shocking siesta taker, Tomski, PH and Twohill will attest to that as I was always the last one asleep and first one awake while we were backpacking. I don't want sympathy! I don't want special foods I just want to get better! I'VE LOST THE LOVE OF SCORING A SICKY!! An excuse to chillax and recover, I no longer want that excuse! Once while at school the world outside the classroom between 9 and 3:15 was exotic and interesting, now it is familiar and engrained. I don't want to watch Jerry Springer or Riki Lake. I don't want to catch up on my Playstation time...I only want to feel better!

Admittedly the way I got crook was totally worth it, had a few late night catch ups with mates over the weekend. That combined with a few hamburgers, again totally worth it, essentially my immune system has given me a biological arse kicking. Surely there is a way to inject vitamin C into a Quarter Pounder?

Anyway, The Gruen Transfer is on!

See? Told you all you were cooler than me.....

And so it begins.....

Interesting this is in many ways......

I have just finished work...it's 1:30am and I am blogging! Never thought this would happen but glad it has and there is a young lady in Brazil who is to thank...or blame is this blog is neither entertaining or funny!

I aim to make it both of those hopefully! I like the metaphor that here I am writing from the place that I endeavour to get away from soon. 5 years I have been working the same part-time job at the pub, to quote Billy Joel's Piano Man "I'm sure I could be a movie star, if I could get out of this place!"

Unlike poor Joe at the bar I'm well placed. I've worked on some very good shows, played some very good roles, I've a good agent, I've a coupla good scripts to work on that I've written and co-written and I've a girlfriend whom I miss dearly and want to see much more permanently! All of these are factors that will lead me to more success in my acting career, hopefully!

This brings me to my shorthand, I've many amazing friends who I shall be referring to in shorthand....I dare say you would get to know them as Die Fraulein (my beautiful girlfriend), Gunner, PH, Deej, ToffeeTimmy, Blondie (my brother), Tomski, Twohill, Bunny, Peachy and no doubt there will be others.

I heard from a lady recently that the most compelling writing comes from writing what you know about. What do I know about? Well acting, movies and tv shows (obviously), sport (especially football and rugby league) and you know acting and sport are quite intrinsically linked....I will elaborate in future blogs of course! Then there is Transformers, steam trains, Jim Carrey, Jurassic Park, Batman, Germany and German, Ireland, Aussie History (oh there is one and it's a pearler), beer, James Bond, Lord Of The Rings, Game of Thrones, Audioslave, The Whitlams, Paul Jennings....and this is just from stuff in my room!

Judging by this you can look forward to a blog of pop culture dagginess, filled with various historical vignettes, inter-spliced with misquoted German phrases. If it were sung it would be by Chris Cornell with Tim Freedman playing the piano in the background while pissed, Optimus Prime would be the narrator and it would be an epic trilogy filled with political intrigue, gratuitous nudity and swearing...that I can almost guarantee ;)

Every day I get up hoping for that phone call from my lovely agent that will change my life.....I can only hope that I get to share it with you soon! Until that day comes I will sharing pieces of my life as I work towards that goal as an actor.....comfortable employment!

I look forward to casting my aspersions in this very public forum and can only hope you get a bit of a giggle and also some satisfaction that you have found someone that you are much cooler than......

You're a legend for having a read!